| The following is an article written by The Flourishing Company and featured in the new e-zine published by the Minority Corporate Counsel Association. |
| December 4, 2003 Excerpt VOLUME I ISSUE I | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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In Brief What they didn't teach you in law school |
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Part 1 of a 7 part series |
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What is Requesting? |
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skill of requesting is the ability to clearly articulate and ask for what
you want or what you would like someone to do, and then receive a clear
reply. By definition,
the person receiving the request can say no.
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| What’s important about mastering the skill of requesting? | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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Many of us make (and receive) requests that are vague and unclear. By replacing imprecise language with clear requests and replies, the greater the chance you will get what you want or expect. |
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| An Important Distinction - Requesting Versus Demanding | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
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One
thing that distinguishes a request from a demand or other forms of speech
is that the request-ee has the ability to say no.
When a police officer says, “Mr. Smith, we have a search warrant.
May we come in?” it may sound like a request, but since Mr. Smith
doesn’t have the option to say “no”, it doesn’t meet the
definition of a request. Similarly, while your GC or lead partner may ask you to do
something using the request formula, “no” may not really be an
acceptable answer. Use your
professional judgment and intuition to decide whether or not you can say
“no” to a request without repercussions.
This article looks only at the mechanics of requesting, and does
not address the issues involving an imbalance of power in a relationship,
such as the power differential between boss and subordinate.
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How to make a REQUEST According to Leadership and the Art of Conversation by Kim H. Krisco, there are 3 basic steps.
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You
are responsible for your role in a conversation.
What
do you choose: to make clear requests or risk not getting what you want?
When
will you choose to make requests? With
whom?
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| Go
ahead! Start now!
Increase
your chances of getting what you want, when you want it and from whom you
want it. Notice what works for you and what doesn’t. If you get stuck, the steps detailed above will help you assess your requesting abilities. |
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